Hey, I just want to start by saying that I really hear you. It’s not easy to open up about stuff like this, so I really appreciate you sharing what you’ve been going through. It sounds like your anxiety is making social situations feel incredibly draining, and I can imagine how exhausting it must be to constantly feel like you’re performing or trying to control every little interaction.
You’re definitely not alone in this. A lot of people experience similar struggles with social anxiety, even if it can feel isolating at times. From what you’ve shared, I think the constant overthinking and rehearsing in your head is a huge part of the mental and emotional energy drain. It’s like you’re preparing for every possible outcome, but it can feel like you’re stuck in that mental loop, unable to fully connect with the present moment.
What’s helped me in similar situations is learning to be more kind to myself. Sometimes, I remind myself that people are usually more focused on their own stuff than on me (even though it doesn’t always feel that way in the moment). If you’re open to it, practicing mindfulness or grounding techniques can sometimes help shift your focus away from the anxiety and back to what’s happening in the present. Things like deep breathing, focusing on your surroundings, or even just taking a moment to pause can make a huge difference, especially when you feel that tension building.
And as hard as it is, letting go of the “perfect” response or reaction can be freeing. It’s okay to be awkward or quiet sometimes, that’s a part of being human. People are a lot more understanding than we give them credit for, and I think most will appreciate the effort you make to engage, even if it’s not flawless.
I’ve also found it helpful to start small. Like, if there’s a conversation or social situation you’re dreading, maybe set a small goal, like just saying “hi” or asking one question. Taking little steps like that can help build your confidence over time without putting too much pressure on yourself.
You don’t have to “act normal” all the time. It’s okay to be yourself, even if it feels hard. And remember, if it helps, it’s totally okay to take breaks when you need them, like stepping outside for a few minutes or even excusing yourself to take a breather in the bathroom.
Thanks again for sharing. You’re not alone in this, and I really hope you find ways to ease some of that tension. If you ever want to chat more or just vent, I’m here. Take care of yourself!
